you think you’re cool but you’re just room temperature
THIS ME 👐😋😳
my favorite quote, ever.
This is what happens to a basketball court when the pipes burst
this is the greatest basketball challenge of all time
getting paired with a cute person for a class project
i never really liked
until i found out
what it tastes like
when you write it in frosting
on top of a cake
I once had a drunk guy tell me I was too sexy to be shooting up at a party. He knocked the needle out of my hands and stepped on the pen, shattering the casing, telling me I should thank him by giving him my number and a kiss. It was my diabetes medicine.
(submitted by anonymous)
my dad just yelled up the stairs “CHLOE DID YOU KNOW THE WEATHERMAN WAS GAY I DIDNT KNOW HE WAS GAY HE JUST GOT MARRIED TO HIS BOYFRIEND” and i was like which weatheman are we talking about here and he said “THE BLONDE ONE WITH THE SHARP HAIR CUT AND THE TIGHT PECS AND THE HOT ASS BODY” dad is there something you want to tell me